One of the things that have really helped me reduce stress levels over the years is letting go of the need for things to be 'perfect'.
So how are stress and perfectionism linked?
It is actually kind of funny for me to reflect on this pattern, which I still fall into sometimes, because there isn't such a thing as perfection, and having a belief in your mind that you can achieve some standard of perfection will only have you chasing an ever-moving yardstick.
Have you ever heard of the saying 'perfection is the enemy of progress'? Perfectionism is sometimes seen as a positive, but in my experience of being a perfectionist and witnessing others that fall into this category, is that progress is slowed down and it just creates anxiety spirals because nothing is ever good enough.
People who expect perfection of themselves also tend to expect it of others, so it not only creates this pressure on the perfectionist but on everyone around them to live up to a certain standard.
There is a similar pattern that runs parallel to this, which is the belief that 'when I achieve this or obtain that, then I will be happy'. But again, the yardstick continually moves and you will never be happy because you will always be wanting more than what you have right now.
So what do these two things have in common?
They both stem from someone chasing something that isn't right in front of them. It prevents the person from being in the present moment and because we can't be content in the past or the future, as we are only existing in the present, it means we won't ever be content.
The other thing these two traits have in common is the person has inability to let go.
The antidote to perfectionism and chasing future achievements is letting go and accepting things as they are.
I'm not saying don't have goals for yourself. However, being a perfectionist is having unhealthy and unachievable goals because the mind creates an ideal that will never be reached. The other state is having these goals but never being happy with what you have right now, which again creates a lot of pressure around 'never being enough'.
So if you catch yourself in either state, what can you do? Perhaps you can ask yourself the following questions:
How can I let go here?
What would happen if I accepted things as they were?
What if I accept that I am doing my best?
How can I be more present right now?
How can I be grateful with the present state?
How can I take the pressure off myself to constantly achieve?
If you want to reduce your stress and anxiety even more, check out the Inner Compass Journal.
Everything about this journal is intentionally easy to follow and simple to integrate into your life. You will see benefits in all aspects of your life, including; your relationship with yourself and others, decision-making, trusting yourself, finding more peace in your life, reducing your stress and anxiety, and making you resilient even through your most difficult moments.
Louise xx
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