Have you ever given up on apps and said "they're just not for me"?
Can I let you in on a secret…?
Apps aren't for anybody! Really, I don't know anyone that has ever said they love them.
But according to a Stanford study it currently remains the number one way people are meeting.
The same study said if couples aren't meeting online, then 27% of them meet at a bar or restaurant, 20% through friends, 11% at work, 9% at school and 7% through family.
If dating apps are absolutely not for you, then I'm all for it. Make sure you get out there and talk to as many people as you can.
'Going offline' just means you need to be more forward, and open. And, let EVERYONE know that you're single and you want to meet someone.
When I was single I made sure that my work colleagues knew that I was open and interested in being set up.
One of them tried to set me up with someone she'd met on an app and thought was a better fit for me, she just couldn't find his details, but the thought was there!
In my experience, the older we get the harder it is to meet people outside of apps because we aren't connecting in big groups as much. So you just might need to get creative.
If you want to know how to meet a partner without dating apps, it's totally possible to meet someone in real life. It's just that the game has changed a bit. I've noticed that even out at bars, people aren't as confident chatting to each other.
When you're out at the supermarket, the dog park, a cafe or catching the train, practice putting out energy that says you're approachable, you're open.
Which means, taking out your headphones, taking off your sunglasses, making eye-contact and smiling at people.
Practice starting conversations with people you aren't interested in, so when there is someone you're interested in, it doesn't feel as nerve-wracking.
The key is to think about some things that you're interested in too. There's no point trying to meet people at bars if you don't enjoy drinking. But maybe there's a run club you could join, trivia nights, a ceramics class.
It might also be that you do something you enjoy attracts all women and you're into men. My favourite sport when I was single was pole dancing. The only men that attended were also interested in men.
But, remember what I said about letting everyone know that you're single? Doing something you love, even if it only exposes you to more friends just widens your network. One of the people in my pole class ended up with the brother of another student!
The bottom line is, however you choose to date it needs to be right for you. But it doesn't mean there is an easier way. The truth is meeting someone means getting out of your comfort zone . Dating apps are hard, but trying to meet people in 'real life' can be hard and awkward too.
The truth is, without apps, I wouldn't have met Ray, my husband.
We didn't live or work near each other or have mutual friends. In fact, the only reason we met is because Ray's university was near my sister's house where I was watching a movie one night, and we got in each other's radius!
Ray said to me at brunch the other day that the reason he asked me out is because I was putting in the effort in our online chats. I was interested and asking questions.
He said without that he wouldn't have asked me out. Ray is a total sweetheart and needed to see that green light!
Whether you want to do apps or not, it's so important that when the right person comes along you're ready, open and putting out great energy.
If you want to get off the rollercoaster of the ups and downs and the negativity dating can bring, then sign up for this FREE Guide: Dating Reset - 7 ways to shift your mindset and energy to attract your dream partner.
Love Louise XX
p.s. I will never tell you HOW to date. You need to figure out what's going to work for you. You do you! Whatever path you take is the right one for you.
p.p.s Got a single friend that would love all these tips, send them this article.
